scoresvideos
Screenwriting I
Table of Contents
Unit 12 Overview: Rewriting and Script Revision Strategies
12.1 The Rewriting Process
12.2 Techniques for Self-Editing
12.3 Incorporating Feedback and Notes
12.4 Polishing Dialogue and Description

Polishing dialogue and description is crucial for creating a compelling screenplay. It's about refining your words to make them more impactful, authentic, and engaging for readers and viewers alike.

This process involves crafting effective dialogue with subtext and distinct voices, trimming unnecessary words, and avoiding on-the-nose exchanges. For descriptions, focus on efficiency, vividness, and showing rather than telling to bring your script to life.

Crafting Effective Dialogue

Using Subtext and Distinct Character Voices

  • Subtext conveys characters' true feelings and motivations beneath the surface of their words
    • Characters may say one thing but mean another, creating tension and depth
    • Subtext can reveal character relationships, power dynamics, and hidden agendas
  • Giving each character a distinct voice helps bring them to life and makes them memorable
    • Consider each character's background, personality, and speech patterns
    • Vary sentence structure, vocabulary, and rhythm to differentiate characters (e.g., a professor speaks differently than a teenager)

Trimming and Pacing Dialogue

  • Dialogue trimming involves cutting unnecessary words and lines to create a leaner, more impactful script
    • Remove filler words, redundancies, and lines that don't advance the story or reveal character
    • Condense dialogue to its essence while still sounding natural and maintaining the intended meaning
  • Rhythm and pacing in dialogue refer to the flow and tempo of the conversation
    • Vary the length and complexity of lines to create a natural, engaging rhythm
    • Use pauses, interruptions, and overlapping dialogue to add realism and reflect character dynamics
    • Control the pacing of dialogue to build tension, release information gradually, or create comedic timing

Avoiding On-the-Nose Dialogue

  • On-the-nose dialogue is overly explicit, stating exactly what characters think or feel without nuance
    • It can feel unnatural, clichéd, and lacking in depth or subtext
    • Avoid having characters directly state the theme, moral, or lesson of the story
  • Instead, aim for subtlety and allow the audience to infer meaning from the characters' words and actions
    • Use metaphors, analogies, and indirect references to convey ideas and emotions
    • Trust the audience to understand the subtext and draw their own conclusions

Enhancing Descriptions

Efficiency and Vividness in Action Lines

  • Action line efficiency means conveying essential information concisely without sacrificing clarity
    • Use strong, specific verbs to describe actions and minimize adverbs and adjectives
    • Avoid unnecessary details that don't contribute to the story or character development
  • Vivid descriptions paint a clear, evocative picture in the reader's mind
    • Use precise, sensory language to describe settings, characters, and actions
    • Employ figurative language (similes, metaphors) sparingly to add depth and texture to descriptions

Showing Instead of Telling

  • "Show, don't tell" means revealing characters' emotions and motivations through their actions and reactions rather than explicitly stating them
    • Describe characters' body language, facial expressions, and behavior to convey their inner states
    • Use dialogue to indirectly reveal characters' thoughts and feelings through what they say (or don't say)
  • Showing allows the audience to experience the story alongside the characters and draw their own conclusions
    • It creates a more engaging, immersive narrative that respects the audience's intelligence
    • Telling, on the other hand, can feel expository, distancing the audience from the characters and story

Incorporating Sensory Details

  • Sensory details engage the audience's senses (sight, sound, smell, taste, touch) to create a more immersive experience
    • Describe how a setting looks, sounds, and smells to transport the reader into the scene
    • Use tactile details to convey textures, temperatures, and physical sensations characters experience
  • Sensory details can also evoke emotions and create a specific atmosphere or mood
    • A creaky, dimly-lit hallway can create a sense of unease or foreboding
    • The aroma of freshly baked bread can evoke feelings of warmth, comfort, and nostalgia

Key Terms to Review (17)

Beat: A beat is a fundamental unit of action or emotion in a screenplay that helps to drive the story forward. It can represent a moment of change, a shift in a character’s emotions, or an important piece of information being revealed. Beats help to structure scenes and can be used to maintain pacing, build tension, and develop character relationships.
Character-specific language: Character-specific language refers to the unique way a character speaks, reflecting their personality, background, and emotional state. This type of language is essential for creating authentic dialogue that resonates with the audience, allowing them to connect with the character's experiences and motivations. By tailoring dialogue to each character, writers can enhance the storytelling and make interactions feel genuine.
Voice consistency: Voice consistency refers to maintaining a uniform tone, style, and character perspective throughout a screenplay. This ensures that the dialogue and descriptions align with the established character traits and narrative style, creating a cohesive reading experience. When voice consistency is achieved, audiences can fully immerse themselves in the story without distractions caused by inconsistent character behavior or fluctuating writing styles.
Emotional truth: Emotional truth refers to the authenticity and genuine resonance of emotions conveyed in a story, particularly in dialogue and description. It’s about how feelings are expressed in a way that feels real and relatable to the audience, making characters and their experiences believable. This concept is crucial because it helps to create connections between the characters and viewers, ensuring that the emotional stakes feel significant and impactful.
Figurative language: Figurative language is a literary tool that uses words or expressions with a meaning that is different from the literal interpretation. It helps create vivid imagery, convey emotions, and add depth to writing. By employing techniques like metaphors, similes, and personification, figurative language can enhance dialogue and descriptions, making them more engaging and impactful.
Conflict-driven dialogue: Conflict-driven dialogue refers to conversations in a script that arise from a struggle or disagreement between characters, revealing their motivations and tensions. This type of dialogue is essential for creating dynamic interactions that propel the narrative forward, as it highlights conflicts that can be internal, interpersonal, or external, making the story more engaging and relatable.
Economy of Language: Economy of language refers to the principle of using the fewest words necessary to convey meaning effectively. In screenwriting, this concept emphasizes the importance of brevity and clarity in both dialogue and description, ensuring that every word serves a purpose in advancing the story or developing characters. This approach not only keeps the audience engaged but also creates a more impactful narrative by eliminating unnecessary information.
Dialogue trimming: Dialogue trimming is the process of refining and shortening dialogue to make it more effective, ensuring that every word serves a purpose in conveying character, advancing the plot, or enhancing the emotional impact of a scene. This technique helps create sharper exchanges that feel more natural and authentic, while also maintaining the pacing of the script. By cutting out unnecessary words or repetitive phrases, writers can focus on what truly matters in the conversation.
Action Line Efficiency: Action line efficiency refers to the concise and purposeful use of action lines in a screenplay, ensuring that each line contributes directly to the storytelling and character development. This concept emphasizes clarity and brevity, allowing the reader to visualize the scene while maintaining a strong narrative flow. By achieving action line efficiency, writers create a more engaging and dynamic reading experience that supports the overall pacing and tone of the script.
Distinct character voices: Distinct character voices refer to the unique ways in which individual characters express themselves through dialogue, reflecting their backgrounds, personalities, and emotions. This concept is essential for creating believable and engaging narratives, as it helps differentiate characters and enhances their individual identities, making their interactions more dynamic and meaningful.
Pacing: Pacing refers to the speed at which a story unfolds, influencing how the audience experiences the narrative. It involves the rhythm of action, dialogue, and description to create a balance that keeps viewers engaged and emotionally invested in the characters and plot.
Show, Don't Tell: Show, don't tell is a fundamental principle in screenwriting that emphasizes the importance of presenting story elements through actions, visuals, and sensory details rather than simply stating them. This approach engages the audience more deeply by allowing them to infer emotions, themes, and character traits through what they see on screen rather than relying on exposition or narration.
Vivid descriptions: Vivid descriptions are detailed, evocative portrayals of characters, settings, and actions that engage the reader's senses and imagination. By using rich language and specific imagery, vivid descriptions help create a strong emotional connection, allowing the audience to visualize and experience the story more fully. They play a crucial role in shaping cinematic moments and enhancing dialogue, making scenes come alive in the viewer's mind.
Sensory details: Sensory details are descriptive elements that appeal to the five senses—sight, sound, smell, taste, and touch—to create vivid imagery and evoke emotions in storytelling. These details help bring scenes to life, making them more engaging and relatable for the audience.
Subtext: Subtext refers to the underlying meaning or implied ideas behind the spoken dialogue or actions in a screenplay, often conveying emotions, thoughts, or motivations that are not explicitly stated. It enriches storytelling by allowing characters to express more than what they say directly, adding depth to interactions and situations.
On-the-nose dialogue: On-the-nose dialogue refers to lines that are overly explicit, stating exactly what a character is feeling or thinking without subtext or nuance. This type of dialogue can hinder authenticity and make characters seem less realistic, as it doesn't allow for deeper interpretation by the audience. Effective dialogue should often imply emotions or thoughts rather than lay them out plainly, creating a more engaging and dynamic experience.
Rhythm: Rhythm refers to the flow and pace of dialogue, capturing the natural cadence of speech and enhancing the overall emotional impact of a scene. It connects to timing, beats, and pauses in dialogue, helping to create a sense of tension or release and making characters’ conversations feel authentic and engaging.